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Week commencing Monday 23rd June – Photo’s & Forms
It’s been a fairly busy week, as I have had to take photos of my tummy and fill in a medical questionnaire for Cosmetica. I filled in the forms and answered loads of questions and sent them off. At first I had trouble uploading the photos but finally managed to send them my ugly tummy photos and whilst I was on their website I read the guest book written by past patients. God I am so excited after reading real stories of other people and reading how well they were treated and how amazing their bodies look. One Lady dropped 2 dress sizes.....blimey me a Size 10. I aint been a size 10 since I was 15 years old. Imagine walking into Next and SHOUTING “Excuse me do you have these Jeans in a Size 10......yes that’s right a size 10 Please.”
I can’t help looking in the mirror each time I walk past trying to imagine a flat tummy. Sean called me this morning. We have a sweepstake on how much my skin removal will weigh. Sean says 10lbs!! Flip me if that’s the case I would wake up after my op snogging the face of Dr Djemal.
The Area Manager was telling me that she had a tummy tuck in England and apparently she was in pain for weeks and has now put all the weight back on. Oh well I am sorry, but I would not allow myself to do that. It has taken me years to lose weight and I did not struggle for 8 weeks on the Cambridge diet and pay £35 per week, just to get Fat again. And I not going all the way to Tunisia (via Frankfurt), to be sliced and diced, just to put all the fat back on again. No way. No More BRIDGETJONES PANTS FOR ME!! I shall step off my soap box now.
Week commencing Monday 30th June – Publicity and a new kitten
I had a lovely email from Debbie. Well it started nice, she said I looked good in the new photos I sent and wondered why the hell I needed surgery then the dreaded words came, “until I saw your Bra and Knickers Shot” and she now knows why I am desperate for the Tummy Tuck. But on a good note she did say she had seen worse! Reading those words and seeing them in black and white really brought it home to me how embarrassing and ugly my stomach is. If Sean ever left me I would never and could never allow another man to see it or touch it.
I received a copy of the announcement press release from Debbie. It read really well and the bit at the end made me Laugh “Anyone Interested in Tina Watson should contact Stratton PR”. Don’t sit by the phone girl, you’ll have a long wait for it to ring.
I’ve been told that my story was aired on Radio Pembrokeshire on the 2pm News bulletin. Boy do I feel embarrassed and nervous. I wonder who else had heard as I don’t need more people to judge me over this. They see the sleek silhouette but they don’t see my body with the hanging skin and stretch marks, if they saw this they would all have a whip round and pay for a whole body lift!
I picked up my gorgeous new Persian baby Kitten this week. Mom said if I lose any more weight there will be nothing left of me. I wish I didn’t still feel fat and frumpy and hate the way I look. I wish Gok Wan was my personal shopper and dressed me. I went into Leamington Spa and decided to buy a few holiday cloths for my intended visit to Tunisia, I don’t want to spend too much money as I will or should I say I hope to be a smaller size. Tried on many cloths in the fitting rooms all a size 14 wishing I was a 12 or less hated looking in the mirror as I could see the fat hanging through my lace knickers God I cant wait until this is all gone.
Week Commencing Monday 30th June – Collect Flight Tickets at last!
Phil at work who I trained with commented on how much weight I have lost since we started together so I told him I am having a tummy tuck and he said I was Mad I did not need it blagh blagh blagh - the same assumption that every one has. If I was brave I would show him the Bra and knickers photo I sent to Debbie then he would soon change his mind.
59 days to go. Oh my giddy aunt, it does feel like time is going so slow! I just want to get on that plane, get knocked out and have my new body in time for my 33rd birthday. I looked in my wardrobe today. Sooo tempted to buy sexy underwear for when Sean comes home but I will resist until I am all healed.
Finally got my Air tickets! Due to admin errors at Thomas Cook they had not been printed and to be honest I was worried that I may have lost my flight, but thank goodness they are now safe in my hands. I am getting on that Jet Plane this is really happening and it is happening to ME!!!
My diary has been published on www.cosmeticsurgeryanswers.co.uk It feels weird and now anyone can read my thoughts. But I informed my fellow compers at www.Moneysavingexpert.com who had informed me about the competition back in May as without them I would never have known about it and never have won. I got nothing but positive feed back from my fellow compers all really pleased. A large group of strangers pleased for me, more then my friends and work colleagues weird!
Week Commencing Monday 7th July – Counting the days
The initial euphoria has worn off and I’m feeling very emotional at the moment - I have so much to deal with, with Sean being away . I have to do everything…..
Be Mom, Dad, Bank Manager, Cook, Cleaner, full Time worker and Part time too and some times it just gets too much for me. And I also have my pending operation which I am a little scared about. Unlike most woman in my situation I have not got the support of my husband as he is thousands of miles away. I know I’m in his heart and mind but it is not the same as having him here were we could talk face to face about it all. At this moment in time I feel as if I have no one to talk to about my worries. I have full trust in Cosmetica and the operation itself does dnot worry me. I’m more worried about after the surgery and how quickly I will heal. Will I be capable of flying home alone and then driving back from moms in Warwick back here to my temporary home in Pembrokeshire?
53 days to go until the new me. And only 12 days until my husband is home. I’m a Virgo so I want this NOW. I’m still in disbelief about winning this great opportunity. Will I become a plastic surgery junkie? As I was watching Katie and Peter ‘The next chapter’ on TV and Jordan’s body is amazing- totally plastic but it shows you how good you could look if you had the money!!
After a carnage week I’m emotionless now and just drifting through the days. The one thing I am looking forward too is in 10 days time I will have my husband in my arms holding me while I excitingly tell him all about my surgery.
Emailed Debbie with the insurance statement I pulled of the BBC website about the fact there being no company that will insure you for plastic surgery. She said not to worry she will speak with Cosmetica Travel and get back to me.
I need this surgery so bad but I am now worried about the “what ifs”
Then again Life is full of “What Ifs”.
But on a more positive note. This year I have 2 things to look forward too. One of them is quite major, my husbands safe return from Afghanistan - and a new body, just wish I could feel on top of the world, Vodka…Nargh cant be bothered to go to Tesco and buy any!!!
Week commencing Monday 14 July – In the paper, hubby home & Jabs
My mind is at rest yet again. I had an email from Debbie about the insurance Cosmetica Travel terms and conditions state they will look after me- Phew!
Missed a call from Katie from the Western Telegraph she wants to arrange a photographer to come round and do a photo and a short interview. This is scary as people will know all about my procedure and judge me, oh well it is what I have always wanted so it is all worth it!
44 days until my new body. I phoned Katie from the Western Telegraph she wants to come round today for an interview and photo, got home at 4.15pm got the kids to hover and polish the house whilst I made myself look pretty.
Katie did not ask many questions when she arrived as I did all the talking. I did feel she looked at me like I did not need surgery. But if she knew what I looked like under these clothes. Looking slim on the outside is different to how I look naked!
The Western Telegraph is out tonight. I had a txt from a neighbour saying I looked wicked in the photo and the article was really good which made me feel special, also had a txt from my boss Jeremy saying the same thing. That coming from a man made my night. I went to bed that night with the biggest smile on my face.
I bought the Western Telegraph. I’m sure the woman at Morrison’s took a double look at me? God the whole of Pembrokeshire has read the story. I have customers in Tesco coming up to me wishing me luck but they also finish it of with “Oh I would not go abroad for that sort of operation”. Flip me, I trust them 100%, I have full faith in them and I am confident I will be corrected!
Thank God, Sean is back for 11days R&R. He’s said how slim I look and how he is worried about the surgery, but I have showed him everything and told him I am a big girl and I will be fine.
Went to the Dr’s today to have my jabs and a pre-op check-up I had to have 5 jabs. I told her about the surgery but she did not seem bothered. I also asked her to check my blood pressure which she did and wrote down 100/54 low blood pressure. But it always has been which is a good thing to have I thinks. My arm is killing my I can’t lie on it ouch!
Sean’s brother and his wife and children have come up for the weekend his wife asks me all about the operation and asks if I am nervous and excited and worried, I say YES to all the above but it is what I want for ME no one else this is Mine and I will be selfish for a moment and love every minute of it.
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